So, my surgery was yesterday. It was a stressful week: what with a sick kid at home, me listening intently to every little nerve in my body and with us trying to sanitize the hell out of everything so I wouldn't end up sick too - which would have had cancelled the surgery, and frankly the thought of waiting another two months was unbearable.
Still, the day came, and there I was. I started crying when they started poking needles and inserting IV's and such - just out of sheer helplessness and the sad familiarity of this situation. In 2008, I've been in the same hospital, having to do pretty much the same surgery instead of getting pregnant and having a baby, as we planned. That fall was one of the darkest moments of my life, but then we got lucky. We got our baby, and now we want to give her a sibling - and look where I am, again.
The doctor didn't come to talk to me after I came out of anesthesia - the nurses told me she's going to call me today, but she did not, it being Saturday. She did call my husband after my surgery ended, though. Basically she told him that everything went smoothly, that there was nothing unexpected to be found, that she found "a bit of" endometriosis, but not much, and treated it, and that my tubes are clear. She took out the endometrioma, and "also something from the left side". The latter makes me uneasy. We did not discuss what to do if there is some other cyst on my other ovary. My ovaries tend to form cysts, most of them disappear within one or two cycles. Why would she take away some harmless cyst and thereby decrease my precious ovarian tissue even more? Why would she do that, especially since we did talk in detail about how worried I am about the ovarian reserve?! Was it something else, or is it just a reflection on how surgeons think - "let's cut out everything extra" - as opposed to normal people? I need to talk to her about it, but I feel quite aggravated now, when I think about it.
I am also childishly disappointed in this whole lack of answers. For some reason, I thought that she would find a lot of endometriosis there, which would have explained fertility issues, spotting between periods, weird sensations and basically all the symptoms in this particular area. Since it wasn't the case, and since nothing she found there looks like it could be the culprit, we are back to square one. Try, try again.
Once the results of all tests come back, I am going to start on the vitamins, supplements, and Doxycycline again, and if everything goes well, we will start trying next cycle. Hitting the same wall again, expecting different results - now this is what passes for sanity in our household...
Still, the day came, and there I was. I started crying when they started poking needles and inserting IV's and such - just out of sheer helplessness and the sad familiarity of this situation. In 2008, I've been in the same hospital, having to do pretty much the same surgery instead of getting pregnant and having a baby, as we planned. That fall was one of the darkest moments of my life, but then we got lucky. We got our baby, and now we want to give her a sibling - and look where I am, again.
The doctor didn't come to talk to me after I came out of anesthesia - the nurses told me she's going to call me today, but she did not, it being Saturday. She did call my husband after my surgery ended, though. Basically she told him that everything went smoothly, that there was nothing unexpected to be found, that she found "a bit of" endometriosis, but not much, and treated it, and that my tubes are clear. She took out the endometrioma, and "also something from the left side". The latter makes me uneasy. We did not discuss what to do if there is some other cyst on my other ovary. My ovaries tend to form cysts, most of them disappear within one or two cycles. Why would she take away some harmless cyst and thereby decrease my precious ovarian tissue even more? Why would she do that, especially since we did talk in detail about how worried I am about the ovarian reserve?! Was it something else, or is it just a reflection on how surgeons think - "let's cut out everything extra" - as opposed to normal people? I need to talk to her about it, but I feel quite aggravated now, when I think about it.
I am also childishly disappointed in this whole lack of answers. For some reason, I thought that she would find a lot of endometriosis there, which would have explained fertility issues, spotting between periods, weird sensations and basically all the symptoms in this particular area. Since it wasn't the case, and since nothing she found there looks like it could be the culprit, we are back to square one. Try, try again.
Once the results of all tests come back, I am going to start on the vitamins, supplements, and Doxycycline again, and if everything goes well, we will start trying next cycle. Hitting the same wall again, expecting different results - now this is what passes for sanity in our household...
The lack of answers is so frustrating! If there's a clear problem, then at least you know. Not knowing is the worst. I wish you luck on the road ahead and I hope that eventually you find some answers.
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