Have you ever had this feeling that everyone in your circle is moving forward - except for you? Of course you applaud your friends' successes, but then you come home and stare at the walls and ask yourself - but what about me?
I've been having that a lot recently. We have few couples friends that had their struggles with infertility - well, now they have the requisite two kids, they moved on. They have great jobs, they bought houses, they enrolled their kids in private schools... they are moving forward with their lives, they are shaping their lives the way they want them. And here we are, stuck in limbo - procreational, financial, emotional. The plan was to send the kid to preschool, have a second one, stay at home for 2-2.5 years, and then off to the workplace. Tell the Universe about your plans, make her laugh.
We've been discussing all this with my friend, who had a totally different dilemma in her life, but her limbo feeling was just the same as mine. Well, today she crossed over to the other side, so to speak - her problem had resolved to her and her family's great satisfaction. I am glad for her, I truly am. But there's a tiny voice in my head - but what about me? We were in the same boat, and now we are not, and there's no one left to commiserate with.
And since I am on the subject of friends, here's a story. There was a friend once, who, when I got successfully pregnant 6 years ago, was also really, really, really wanting a baby. I presented her with what was left from my supplies - ovulation strips, unopened PreSeed, etc. - and wished her good luck. She got pregnant soon afterwards, and told me that my gift gave her the luck indeed. Recently, she had her second baby (thus realizing my dream scenario, see above). She has her own stash of supplies left. Guess what - she never even offered them to me. She offers to sell them on some online board, spinning some yarn re: them being lucky... I don't care about $10 worth of strips, but could have used some luck, former friend.
I've been having that a lot recently. We have few couples friends that had their struggles with infertility - well, now they have the requisite two kids, they moved on. They have great jobs, they bought houses, they enrolled their kids in private schools... they are moving forward with their lives, they are shaping their lives the way they want them. And here we are, stuck in limbo - procreational, financial, emotional. The plan was to send the kid to preschool, have a second one, stay at home for 2-2.5 years, and then off to the workplace. Tell the Universe about your plans, make her laugh.
We've been discussing all this with my friend, who had a totally different dilemma in her life, but her limbo feeling was just the same as mine. Well, today she crossed over to the other side, so to speak - her problem had resolved to her and her family's great satisfaction. I am glad for her, I truly am. But there's a tiny voice in my head - but what about me? We were in the same boat, and now we are not, and there's no one left to commiserate with.
And since I am on the subject of friends, here's a story. There was a friend once, who, when I got successfully pregnant 6 years ago, was also really, really, really wanting a baby. I presented her with what was left from my supplies - ovulation strips, unopened PreSeed, etc. - and wished her good luck. She got pregnant soon afterwards, and told me that my gift gave her the luck indeed. Recently, she had her second baby (thus realizing my dream scenario, see above). She has her own stash of supplies left. Guess what - she never even offered them to me. She offers to sell them on some online board, spinning some yarn re: them being lucky... I don't care about $10 worth of strips, but could have used some luck, former friend.
